Hi

Well it's been another year since I last posted anything and I suppose I'd like to get the ball rolling again since my most recent scans have not looked too pretty. On Thursday I'm driving to Ann Arbor for a spectroscopy scan so Dr Junck can get a better look at some areas of concern he noted on the previous scan. I hate to say it, but I'm slowly starting to lose faith in my ability to beat this thing. That's a terrible thing to say, and deep inside I'm not sure i really mean it, but it's been a very frustrating past couple weeks for me.

My headaches have been getting worse recently, and I can't help feeling that they may be heralding the end. Everything's a portent of death these days! And yet my spirits are still generally high. After my last scan, Dr. Junck did the usual field of vision test and my performance was especially poor. So much so that he advised that I stop driving because my peripheral has apparently taken a dive. I told him straight away that it was out of the question, but it made me think...and it made me depressed.. Several days after that discouraging news, I scratched up the side of my Element trying to Park behind Dodd's Records on Division st; talk about slap in the face. Mortified as I was, I don't think it was the result of my compromised visual field, rather it felt like an error I made in my estimation of distancel. The voice of denial is loud and persistent it seems :)

It is not all bad happenings with me though. Earlier this week I had a very lovely and long overdue chat with Vilma, who is now in Brazil continuing her research. I had been worried for a while that she was attempting to cut off contact with me completely, as several initial efforts at contact were ignored/unreturned. We had a great chat though that totally made my day and restored a portion of my faith in the justice of the universe. lulz She's back in Brazil right now doing research for her PhD. I'm sure we'll talk more once she returns.

...And then there was Alex


So a couple weeks ago I flew to California to attend the yearly Dragons Orientation in the Sierras. (I still owe mom a couple hundred for the ticket I think...yikes!) The Orientation was, as usual, AMAZING, but the unexpected presence of the one Alex Kendall made it especially memorable. Alex is a girl I've had a crush on for years and when I found out she was going to be in the Sierras (after I had already arrived in LA, mind you) my heart skipped several successive beats before finally fluttering back into my chest on the soft winds of anticipation. She arrived just as perfect as the picture of her I keep in my head. I had heard that she had recently broken up with her longtime boyfriend, so I was hopeful that I might be able to assert myself tactfully. Of course, within moments of her arrival I learned that she is already in possession of a new, presumably improved, boyfriend. And how could I have been surprised? A commodity so precious (lol) has but a snowflake's chance in hell of staying single for long.

Alex and I spent both free days hanging out together, and it was great. If anything, she's even more impressive than I thought she was. She not only seemed to take a real interest in my birding exploits, or at least her interest in my interest seemed real, but we also discovered a kindred love of literature. We ended up exchanging lists of our top 5 favorite books with the intention of starting up a literary correspondence :)
Right now I'm reading "The Things They Carried" and enjoying it very well. In fact, I think I may postpone the completion of this post so that I may read a bit. :)